Kai came out as trans nearly 10 years ago (Image: Sharon Kilgannon/@alonglines)

Kai, 18, has a lot more on his mind than the average teenager.

He has worn a chest strap every day since he came out at the age of nine.

While Binder eases his dysphoria, Kai says they are “tight” and “restricting” which makes him uncomfortable and isn’t a permanent solution.

Top surgery is the next step for Kai, but he’s been waiting for the procedure on the NHS since he was a teenager and it could be years before he’s at the top of the list.

“It’s been a long and hard road and waiting another five years on the NHS is just too much to bear,” Kai said.

The teenager from Hove has now taken matters into his own hands and will fund the surgery he needs through crowdfunding, in what he describes as a “critical step” on his journey.

Although he was nervous about revealing his truth, Kai’s mother Rachel fully supported him (Image: Fox Fisher/My Genderation

Kai has come this far, explaining, “I started to see life as a girl – and I knew from the age of three that something was wrong and that I had been given the wrong sex and sex at birth.”

At the age of four he refused to wear dresses, while at the age of six he asked to have his hair cut short.

Kai felt like he “never fit in” and his school performance suffered as a result.



chest security

While some chest strap methods can be dangerous, the NHS recognizes that some young people use a chest strap to reduce social anxiety and thoughts of harming themselves.

To minimize damage, there are the following recommendations, based on a recent meta-analysis of the evidence And recent research in the field:

  • Use a specially designed ring binder of the correct size
  • Make sure it fits properly – it shouldn’t be too tight and certainly shouldn’t restrict breathing or cause pain
  • limit the wearing time as much as possible
  • don’t sleep in a folder
  • have full days off and wear a panty liner whenever possible.

After being offered help with problems at school, nine-year-old Kai realized he had to reveal his truth and told his mother, “I’m really a boy.”

“In the end I came out not knowing who wouldn’t be there and not knowing if my mom would look at me the same way — but I did it because I knew I had to,” he explained.

“Fortunately, my mom supported me every step of the way and I’m so thankful for that.”

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Within a few months, Kai’s behavior and academic performance had improved dramatically, and he says he “almost immediately became a lot happier as a person.”

“When people stopped calling me a girl, I just felt like myself,” he added. “A lot of tears have been shed, but also a lot of laughter and life lessons learned.”

After learning what Kai was going through, his mother Rachel contacted filmmaker, artist and writer Fox Fisher, whom she had seen on the Channel 4 show My Transsexual Summer.

The shackles Kai has to wear make him feel constantly uncomfortable (Photo: Fox Fisher/My Genderation

Fox, who is a trans man and directs My Genderation, began documenting Kai’s experiences in 2013 and has spent the next decade following his journey with a movie (Life of Kai) due out later this year.

He says working with Kai was an “incredibly powerful experience” that “healed in a very personal way.”

“I’ve spent much of my life trying desperately to live up to societal expectations of what it means to be a woman,” Fox explains. “Kai’s journey has allowed me to explore and heal my own experiences. His resilience and determination to live authentically was nothing short of inspiring.”

Fox continued, “We’ve been filming with Kai for 10 years to show that trans kids often know who they are and need the support and guidance of their loved ones to navigate the healthcare system.

“We’ve followed Kai on his quest for hormone blockers to prevent fake puberty, searched for love, finished school, started testosterone desperately and now he’s hoping for a first class surgery.

Kai has been tying his chest for over nine years. The hormone blockers were not administered until Kai was able to show caregivers that his body had developed. That helped interrupt puberty, but didn’t stop Kai from shaping his chest.”

He says the thought of waiting another five years for top surgery in the NHS is “too much to take” (Photo: Fox Fisher/My Genderation

A private business costs between £7,500 and £9,000, which Kai – who works full-time as a cleaner and carer for at-risk adults – can’t afford with his salary.

He hopes to raise enough money to undergo the procedure at a clinic in Manchester. [his] own skin.

My Genderation documents Kai’s journey – here he is 12 years old (Photo: Sharon Kilgannon/@alonglines)

Kai’s mother Rachel added: “Kai has always been a fun and loving person and I am so proud to see him grow into the kind and generous young man he is today.

“The My Genderation movies about Kai have inspired and encouraged so many and I would love to see him get what he needs after an already long journey.”

Make a donation to Kai’s flagship product on GoFundMe.